


Rebellious minds

by captainhurricane



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: F/M, PTSD-implications
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-09
Updated: 2014-07-09
Packaged: 2018-02-08 04:25:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1926576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainhurricane/pseuds/captainhurricane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All we can do is live.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rebellious minds

**Author's Note:**

> wrote this as kind of a comfort-fic for a tumblr-buddy. sorry for kinda being mean to the Raiden/Rose-relationship. Cough.

”Who is this?” The gruff voice actually answering the phone gives Raiden a start but he clears his throat, tries to be quiet as he sneaks to the balcony. It’s a clear, bright night and Raiden’s limbs don’t feel like his own.

”It’s me, Snake. It’s Raiden,” he answers after a moment, sitting down on the comfortable couch him and Rose had assembled together, her careful smile seared into his heart. He wishes he could love her properly.

”Raiden?” Solid Snake repeats from the other end of the phone. The line rattles for a bit but Raiden takes a deep breath and the line is clear again. Raiden draws his legs against himself and nods, even when the other man can’t see it.

”Can’t sleep, huh?” Snake says then when there is no answer. Raiden swallows. Breeze flowing through the balcony makes the sweat on his skin cool off. It’s been a while since Big Shell and sometimes Raiden can’t tell how long exactly, some days it’s days, some days it’s weeks. Rosemary looks at him sometimes with that weird look in her eyes but she doesn’t say anything.

”No. Talk to me about something,” Raiden swallows again, rubbing his throat. Another breeze flows by and Raiden shivers, wonders why he doesn’t just go back inside to Rose and curl his arms around her. Like that would keep their relationship intact and stable and would make Rose stop looking at him with pity. Snake huffs.

”Alright, kid.”

”And don’t call me kid,” Raiden murmurs and presses his forehead against his knees. He’s so tired. It had taken him ages to get rid of the nightmares and here they were on full force again and had left Raiden with a lingering fear that something is about to happen. Snake huffs again, like a laugh.

”Alright. We’re going to go to Alaska tomorrow. I bought a dog,” Snake makes a noise and Raiden figures it’s him smoking a late night cigarette.

”We? What kind of a dog?” Raiden asks and looks forward, glad that they live high enough so that the only thing he sees is the dark blue sky.

”A husky. Otacon is with me,” Snake answers and Raiden takes a moment to remember the guy in a lab coat and glasses and with sadness pressing down his shoulders.

”Oh.”

”We’re going to go by helicopter,” Snake adds after a moment, yawning.

”Oh. What are you doing there?” Raiden isn’t actually interested in that or Otacon, he’s just glad to hear a voice that holds no judgement.

”Classified,” Snake answers but his voice turns slightly gentler as he continues. Raiden feels warmer.

”Kid, you’re not your past. You have a reason to put down your gun, take it. Leave the war to us who have nothing to lose.” Raiden fidgets, makes no snappy remark about the nickname.

”Everyone has something to lose,” Raiden murmurs. Snake sighs.

”Look, kid. Raiden. We soldiers are good at one thing and one thing only and so it’s understandable we need to learn other skills as well. Like living. Try it out.”

”Snake,” Raiden says, voice barely more than a whisper. Big Shell wasn’t fun by any means nor were the memories it and George Sears- another Snake- brought up but he wasn’t alone in there at the end.

”I’ll contact you. It’s gonna be fine, kid. Just fine.” The call ends before Raiden manages to open his mouth again. He sighs and lowers the phone, only then realizing how much he’s shivering. He hisses and sneaks back inside, glad for the tiny twinge of warmth talking to Snake had brought up. It’s not like they were friends or anything like that, but Raiden figures Snake could be called a comrade of sorts. Musing such thoughts Raiden slips back into the bed and falls asleep next to Rose.

*

*

Raiden thinks of Snake’s words months and years later as he finds himself in a situation with no escape. Just live, Raiden. Live. His body is taken from him but that one word remains.

*

*

Comrades. Snake is older yet still the same and Raiden no longer has limbs to call his own. He looks down and it’s all sleek metal and shining armour. He still dreams of battlefields. I’m trying to survive. No, I’m surviving. I’m living. Snake is by his side, old yet strong to the last. Raiden smiles.

*

A family. Rose has shorter hair now but her posture is relaxed, her smile ever so kind. Little John shows a drawing that he drew with pride only a little boy can muster and Raiden finds it in himself to laugh.

*

He participates in Snake’s funeral and doesn’t shed a tear. I’m living, Snake, he tells the casket and the grave and the air. White flowers are growing on this graveyard. Were he to walk a little bit to the left, he would find the grave of an important woman. I’m living and that’s all that matters. Thank you.


End file.
